Eagles dive bomb Chiefs, 4-1

  • Published
  • By Staff Sgt. Matt McGovern
  • 60th AMW Public Affairs
The Chiefs became easy target practice for the Eagles as they triumphed in four of five dodge ball matches at the fitness center March 2. 

The Eagles credit their wins largely because of their defensive catching ability. 

“Col. Byron ‘Don’t Call Me Kathrine’ Hepburn catches like Cal Ripken,” said Chief John ‘Hard A-Z’ Wood. “He’s the first guy we’re taking out next time - a rematch is a must.” 

The Eagles, made up of Travis’ colonels from across the base, had an interesting assortment of words after the battle against the Chiefs team, made up of Travis’ chief master sergeants. 

“The Chiefs are all valiant warriors,” said Col. Tracy ‘Hit Me With Your Best Shot’ Hardwick. “I’ll honor all fallen warriors.” 

The Eagles showed fast-pitching skills, occasionally leaving behind ball imprints on the bodies of the Chiefs. 

“I was the first injured chief, I received a bruise on my leg from Col. Robert ‘The Man’ Millmann, who was probably the Eagles’ secret weapon,” said Chief Carol ‘My Exec Forgot To Mention It’ Johnson. 

According to Chief Johnson, Colonel Hardwick commented prior to the game, “The Chiefs great grandkids will have bruises when this is over.” 

Chief Johnson explained the reasoning behind the Chiefs loss. 

“Good chiefs would never let their commanders look bad, so we had to loose,” she said with a smile. 

Smiles and laughter were shared by players and audience, along with loud bellows from the crowd following every solid hit. 

“It was extremely enjoyable - it was another good opportunity to improve camaraderie and morale,” said Col. Al ‘Side Arm’ Carney. 

Though the Eagles won the first four games, the Chiefs seemed to gain momentum and lasted longer each game resulting in the win of the final game. 

According to Chief James ‘Just Like Mike’ Tyson, the Chiefs had the MVP on their team.
“Chief Brye ‘Hole in one Divot’ McMillon was our secret weapon; he was the last man standing in the third game.” 

The games concluded with a prank played on the departing Chief McMillon. He was handcuffed by security forces, fitted with a Kevlar vest then lined up and beamed by a borage of dodge balls by the Eagle Team. 

“It was a good game, plenty of teamwork and camaraderie, it worked out well,” said Chief McMillon. “It was a great way in my opinion to be sent home.”